tossing and turning

Its 6:30 and im still up...which is considered as unusual for me. these last few days im down with a bad case of fever and runny nose. pretty annoyed with the runny nose thingy actually coz i havent been able to get any real sleep starting few days back due to this. *damn!*
well to add to my miserable state, there are a few things that have been on my mind too. i just cant put them into words....its indescribable. But i'll try. So here goes.

Firstly, i was pissed off with a particular person. ive talked to my fwen Mer about it and yeah, he said it was a small thing. sure i agreed with him..to a certain extent. the situation went like this:

-> he buzzed me.
-> i was dealing with some things at that moment.
-> he said he wanted to watch a movie at his lappie. i said ok.

*few hours went by*

-> he buzzed me back. i responded. we chatted.
-> he said he wanted to sleep. i was furious. *All this within minutes???*

So u see folks.. this is WHY i was seething! the plan i had in mind was like this, he finish that stupid movie, buzz me back and talk.
I dun care if you wanna sleep, im not wicked to deprive you from going into your 'LALALAND KINGDOM'!
But for just a few minutes of talking after those hours? My fwen, dats unforgivable. Hey, i was waiting for you to actually buzz me back ouhkie??

End.

wats up?

i dun feel well. i am not myself. i feel like d world is looking down on me.
so tired of being here. feels like i dun belong.
few fwens dun understand me; not bcoz they dun want to but bcoz i duno how to explain it to them.
i feel empty. i feel not at ease. i feel lifeless. WHY??
mer..alina..sorry for not being able to to express myself. i myself am confused of wats happening to me.
im so consumed with unhappiness that my mind hasnt been able to think correctly.

a day at the centre

PATIENT'S DETAILS

Name: NURUL FARHANAH AB RAHIM
Code: 2009011016
Date checked in: 151109
Time checked in: 1430
Attending doctor: NORAINI MD NOR
Status: SUSPICION OF CONTAMINATING THE ZM1234 ZOMBIE-LIKE VIRUS
Action: QUARANTINED UNTIL HOLIDAYS ARE OVER

Tgk inilah hasil bile aku da weng. hahaha

these are..

since ive started my deg in shah alam, ive been hit on with several misfortunes but thank god ive fwens who can help me out in times in need. alina, syera n fairuz.

--> ouh yeah diz guy has helped me on several occasions. mase finals, mase balik dr kL n a few more.
tenkiuwk so much laa incik fairuz. im so grateful. god bless u. hehehe.
--> deserved a mention here is also syera who had once gone all d way from puncak alam to fetch me at kl sentral. (sumting happened here, long story) and many outings done together. luv u babe.
--> not forgetting another dearly beloved, alina. shes such a dear fwen. walaupon kdg2 aku xphm lawak die but i luv her presence. n she too, has helped me a lot! there's diz time wen die amek gak aku even tho her scooter prob sket. alina, ur d best!

shopping?

went out with syera n kechik today, after they've finished their today's paper. planned to go to the curve, otw there we were a bit lost. hahaha. pusing2, da laa kene byk tol. biadap tol.
had lunch at Teh Tarik Place (not really nice, dun go there!) then went round the curve to find my mom's pwezzie (which was my main reason for going there).
wanted to buy her the estee lauder parfum but xde lak counter EL kt ctu. ke aku yg rabun xnmpk? hahahaha! so i bought her two novels. John Grisham - The Associate and Jeffrey Archer - Prisoner At Birth.
my mom loves novels like that. so might as well buy her something that she'll read over n over again. worth every dollar kott. hehehehehe.
and anyways, i bought myself a wedges flip flop with big beads of the colours black n turqoise. n also a black pumps which ive been looking for everywhere but sold out on my particular size. so pe lagi kene bli laa kan? hahaha. black pumps with gold studs. how nice is dat?
later on, bank in rm100 for my sis. shian die. hahaha

- a day after the finals ended-

it has only been a day after MY papers ended. how do i feel? weird. bored. *omg i cant believe i said dat* crushed. scared. empty. All feelings all mixed up. i dunno how to describe it.
i feel empty coz i havent been close with d ppl in my class...so i dunno how am i gonna get thru d coming sems. scared coz im afraid of my result. i certainly did NOT do well on my 3rd paper (grammar). sgt shedey kott. omg penat laa nak type camni. so here goes :

-> i watched MJ's This Is It and it was SUPERAWESOME! trust me. i duno u guys but i really did enjoy it.

-> my mom's bday is coming soon so im planning to buy her the Estee Lauder's Sensuous edp. wadya tink? i havent had the chance to test d scent yet though.

-> i juz got my pt. wat'd i buy?? TWO mng bags n a RL romance edp. the rest i duno wat'd i buy. hahahhaa. rm1000+ ive given my mom.

-> ouhyeah ive rekindled my fwenship with diz particular fwen of mine. hehehe. its been 2+ months since we've talked. gosh. however so.....it feels a bit weird now dat we r on good terms back.....

-> gonna watch 2012 with a few fwens of mine nex wk. hehehe. cant wait!

.: f i n a l s :.

i hate it i have four papers for this finals. FOUR. yeah not much. but those papers are killer papers!

ALS410 - CRITICAL THINKING 28.10.09
[done]

ALS420 - INTRODUCTION TO LANGUAGE AND LINGUISTICS 30.10.09
[done]

ALS422 - DESCRIPTION OF ENGLISH 2.11.09
[done]

ALS450 - WRITING FOR ACADEMIC PURPOSES 4.11.09
[tomorrow]

God..i really hate this finals....i soooo effing hate it! i dunno how i'd fare out of this finals...
especially the ALS422 paper....it was such a killer paper, i even thought of killing myself after having sat for it. Literally. i dun have any confidence in answering them...i feel such guilt that after each paper that i've sat i'll apologize to my mom for not faring well. huhuhuhu!

In fact, during revision for the grammar paper, i didnt have enuff sleep. i was studying n diagramming the whole day... i was effing tired. damn! from 10-ish pm onwards ive had gallons of nescafe until 3am. my head felt like exploding n i felt sick, so i took panadols.
mmg hebat dowh. caffeine + drugs. such ecstatic combination. then i couldnt take it nemore, i called up my fwen till it was 5am. then i fell asleep. in d xm hall dat morning, i went blank!
dammit. even a simple sentence i couldnt make a diagram out of it. this is utter shitness!
tapi pdn muke aku pn sape soh stdy lmbt.

God help me pls. i just hope to get pass for all the papers. i dun want to repeat any papers! :(