2 days before

Sept 20


I have only one class today and its Pragmatics until noon and after that im free as a bird haha.
i thought of doing something 'useful' after class n not doze off as always [hoho] but then after the wonderful unusually long bath ive taken, my eyes felt so heavy and so....i UNINTENTIONALLY wandered off to lalaland hehe.
Im just wondering, why is it that everytime when we are having our beauty sleep, now then thats the time when suddenly everyone wants to keep in touch with u? haha. no offense, i love u but ur cutting my only time of having my wishful thinking crap from being materialized hoho. nways my point here is, i slept from that evening until the next morning! hahaha. i dunno what possessed me but i seriously did that. not that its such a weird thing that ive ever done nways hahaha! even when haziq asked if i wanted to join them for the bball session at the court, i said no for the reason of 'takde mood' haha. [padahal tgh sedap pengsankan diri]

Sept 21


The morning class started at 1030. i was already prepared to see the friends and all, suddenly when i came to the door, OMG ITS LOCKED! damn! i forgot to remind imma not to lock it when she was heading off to class a while ago haish! i went to the window at the front and there walked una. "UNA! UNA! aku terkunci! sobsob. tolong2!"
She was laughing and said, " ko jatuhkan rambut ko nnt aku panjat naik. hahaha" cehh sempat lagi tu wat lawak camtu dlm keadaan tegang begini huhu. then eca came n they all came upstairs to check me out. she said, "ko nih da la terkunci, credit pon takde. ko tunggu je la prince katak dtg save ko haha"
and i reluctantly told them to go to class without me. for the first time in my life i was so enthusiastic to go to class n there i was, locked in the house. all by myself. [cewah wat drama jap] ouhyeah, forgot to tell ya, the reason i havent got my keys is coz i accidentally left them in my mom's car, specifically at the handle btw. bijak paan bijak. thank god nad came back during lunch hour and so i was free! finally. i borrowed her keys to duplicate and went straight to class later on.

I texted T around 9-ish to ask where he at. he said he was at home so it was presumed that there was no games tonite. sembang2 seperti biase and he asked me the reason for the no-show at court yesterday. i honestly told him that i was sleepy and takde mood. huhu entah mengape aku berkelakuan sebegitu. but then suddenly i wanted to ask him who was there yesterday nite. the answer kinda made me regretted that i hadnt show up haha! he said everyone was there, S was there too. only jeli didnt come that nite which is considered as rare [quoted exactly from T]
ouhh man. if only i'd come to the game.......haish! i told maddy about it and die sempat bahan aku, saying "rindu laa tu!" hahaha. cehh. jahat ko. sobsob.
after the little chat with T, suddenly my eyes were wide open. i asked maddy if she wanted to have a drink at barra and she agreed. i asked shahid if she wanted to join us but she already got herself a nice mcd meal. haish.
maddy asked if nak ajak haziq skali and so i told her to call him up. turned out he was at sect 2 with Yuz and Jay, doing idk what haha. he said he will come but he asked us to wait for a while.
Yuz taught us a new game consisting of dices. i didnt play, as usual coz i dun like complicated games which involve calculation and all hahahaa. [it wasnt hard actually tapi saje malas senar]
after a while, we moved outside coz they all wanted to smoke shisha and so the game continued to playin cards, [which i played as well] until 2-ish am. haha thank god tomorrow's class is at 2pm.

Okay since everyone keeps buggin me to feed them something due to the long overdue of updating this blog...owkei here goes.
It was R A Y A on the 10th of Sept and i was in Perak for the celebration with my sis. my mom was in Penang on the first raya. Now lemme tell u, i had a really bad raya experience this year due to my long-running cold and sore throat. In my family, the nite before raya itself is supposed to be our  'makan besar' with the lemang n all. However i couldnt bring myself to even look at the food. 
i mean, this is FOOD im talking about! food and me like, interconnected! haha.
Everyone (the cousins) was having fun about, playin cards, gossipin and takin photos while I only got myself reserved on the bed upstairs, forcing myself to drink plain water non-stop. cis. some raya rite? wanna see my first day of raya pic? dun even think of laughing. 

and so i went back to KL during the second raya coz my sis had to start off work early [damn!] and there goes my chance of socializing with the other cousins. [sigh] i recovered like, on the 5th or 6th raya, and during that time i pretty much loitered around the house but hey the fun part was i had my hair dyed back - ash brown this time. the colour's not really light but still it's evident. hehe.

actually nothing much can i say in this post coz i havent done anything fun really during the break. even my assignments i took no notice of. haha! but someone did make my day when that person sent me an mms haha.

so happy reading coz there's not much to be read. 

f r i e n d s

acquired some new peeps lately. they are all awesome dudes. hahaha.

basketball dudes ~

Vee

Wats a Vday?
People owez look at it as something like "a day of love".
There are many point of views from people about what vday truly means to them. 
For me, i dun really celebrate vday. i just wish people whom i loved vday as i think vday represents love.
So for me wishing my loved ones vday means that i luv n care so much about them. not only just on that particular day itself of course, but every single day just as long as im alive. its just on my opinion, that on this one special occasion its something that we should declare our love to them proudly out loud! hahaha.

Happy V-Day sayangs!  ;)

new addiction :)

Here's my latest addiction. Enjoy.

Ooo I wish I can have those shoes. Gorgy!

 

Audrey Hepburn-ish. Me likey! :)

 

Andro-style! Perfect for today's liberated women

I got hooked on this addiction thanks to Feena. huhuhu. Further info: Looklet

no silence needed

This past holidays have been episodes of weird, funny,sad moments all happening at once.
+ Ive always have these weird dreams which i dun really like. 
[I wake up to reliving those nitemares.]

+ Im forced to turn off my fon for a few days. 
[Downside? I miss him. I miss my fwens. Good part? Im finally able to actually distract myself from everything else.]
+ I got myself to driving around the neighbourhood. Yeay! [Haish bl tah nak amek lesen]
+ I save my credit during this period. Yeay again. hahaha. [or is it sumthing to be celebrated for?]
+ Im worried sick for this one particular person. I hope he's ouhkie now.
+ I sooo not ready to go back to my place in SA. I wish d holidays would b prolonged. :(
+ I wish to dye my hair. Again.
+ My eyes are tired n strained from  overfocusing on d damn lappie. huhuhu
+ I hope this Xmas my certain one wish would come true. HA-HA. 
+ To my fwen Azmer PLEASE UPDATE YOUR BLOG!! thank u. hehehehe 

they are obviously related somehow..no?

Best friends till the end!!! by aahhmna!! on Polyvore.com

Did you ever know that you're my hero
And everything I would like to be
If I can fly higher than an eagle
You are the wind beneath my wings
It might have appeared to go unnoticed
but I've got it all here in my heart
I want you to know I know the truth
Of course I know it
I would be nothing without you

I had this dream. This one helluva weird dream. In this dream a certain fwen of mine played the lead actor part. I duno how he got it, but he did. haha. Anyways, the storyline was pretty straightforward n simple. 
This particular fwen of mine was comatose. I duno how he got to be like dat, but yeah he did. I was late to know about his wellbeings until his fwen, whos my fwen too told me bout his condition. I rushed to the hospital with Afiq [how the hell he got to be in the dream as well, i dunno. sry fiq! huhu], just to see him on the bed, with his eyes closed. I greeted his family, his mom offered me her seat then they went out of the room to give me some privacy. [heheh]
I sat there for awhile thinking wat to say to him, before finally i managed to utter some words. I touched his left hand, it was pretty cold n lifeless. My eyes were getting hot with hold-back tears. I tried my hardest to converse with him, I talked n talked like it was a two-way thing wen in reality, it was rather a one-way conversation. 
I asked him to go back into consciousness bcoz then, nobody could be my alarm clock nemore. Nobody that i could nag every now n then, nobody whom i could....ahh it was not important. These words were the ones i clearly remembered in the dream.

I said, "The important thing for now is that you have to wake up from your deep sleep! You have to be alive, be the old you! Dont you remember, we did say that someday wen we were older, I said that you would b working under me n you said otherwise. Whos gonna nag me for bathing late at nite nemore if not you? Please wake up.... I promise i wont nag you nemore.."

After managed to fight back tears, I finally felt them flowing down my cheeks, unstoppable in seeing no response from him, not even a bat of the eyelid.
In the end, his family came back into the room n his mother consoled me a bit [eiyh? salah org nih auntie huhu] before Afiq finally led me out of there. It didnt stop there actually. I made a short drama in the hallway. [I broke down n cried huhu. Pergh drama siott]
Pastuu harap mf aku terjage. heheh. But anyways I just wanna say to that someone, regarding you going to the hospital n this dream i had...it wasnt wat im looking forward to.
Pls tc of urself. Hugs.

[ Hear me out ]

Can u guys not fight? I hate being in a hateful surroundings. I hate seeing people fight. I hate fights! In fact, i despise fights! Every now n then there will be nasty words popping up from nowhere. Man, this is bullshit!
How can u guys remain like this?? Do u guys know what effects does it have on ME?? I become depressed man! Im a person full of emotions lately. It seems i cant think about whats happening in a right state of mind!  

I hate u, I hate u!

perasaan klakar dlm tempoh mase sekejap

Aku suddenly rase nak kua secare solo pada hari esok. Aku telah menetapkan niat aku untuk tidak berjumpe dengan sesiape jua. Yea Farhana! Set your mind! Ur going S O L O! yeehaa!!
A few  minutes later @Skype...
  

Aku: Sok i nak kua berjalan2 hehee.   

[Besh nih tgk reaksi die] 
Die: Owh. nak gi maner? ngan saper? 

[Pergh laju j tanye. ceh] 
Aku: Xtau ag nak g ne. sorg2 j. hahaha.   

[Hehehe. acah sket dlu.]
Die: Nape xkua ngan akak?

Aku: Akak kua rini. 
[Sket2 akak. ceh.]

Die: Owh nape x ikot akak?

Aku: Akak de hal die.

[Eiyh byk tanye lak. you j laa ikot akak. ceh.]

Die: Nak kua kol bp?

Aku: Tghri kott. Np?

[Hehehe. teman laa i, teman laa i.] 
Die: Owh. Ok x klo i teman u sok nak?

[Yeayeay! Nak2!] 
Aku: Wtpe?

[Aku nak cakap len laa!] 
Die: Teman u la. 
Aku: Nak wtpe? I nak kua sorg laa.

[Eiyh camne ley kua words len nih??] 
Die: Ok fine. Kua tu leklok, haty2.

[Alaawh.......tetibe aku rase sedih secare mendadak. huhuhu] 

Yea seperti tertakdir, aku mmg kua sorg2 laa. huhuhu. padan muke aku.

tossing and turning

Its 6:30 and im still up...which is considered as unusual for me. these last few days im down with a bad case of fever and runny nose. pretty annoyed with the runny nose thingy actually coz i havent been able to get any real sleep starting few days back due to this. *damn!*
well to add to my miserable state, there are a few things that have been on my mind too. i just cant put them into words....its indescribable. But i'll try. So here goes.

Firstly, i was pissed off with a particular person. ive talked to my fwen Mer about it and yeah, he said it was a small thing. sure i agreed with him..to a certain extent. the situation went like this:

-> he buzzed me.
-> i was dealing with some things at that moment.
-> he said he wanted to watch a movie at his lappie. i said ok.

*few hours went by*

-> he buzzed me back. i responded. we chatted.
-> he said he wanted to sleep. i was furious. *All this within minutes???*

So u see folks.. this is WHY i was seething! the plan i had in mind was like this, he finish that stupid movie, buzz me back and talk.
I dun care if you wanna sleep, im not wicked to deprive you from going into your 'LALALAND KINGDOM'!
But for just a few minutes of talking after those hours? My fwen, dats unforgivable. Hey, i was waiting for you to actually buzz me back ouhkie??

End.

wats up?

i dun feel well. i am not myself. i feel like d world is looking down on me.
so tired of being here. feels like i dun belong.
few fwens dun understand me; not bcoz they dun want to but bcoz i duno how to explain it to them.
i feel empty. i feel not at ease. i feel lifeless. WHY??
mer..alina..sorry for not being able to to express myself. i myself am confused of wats happening to me.
im so consumed with unhappiness that my mind hasnt been able to think correctly.

a day at the centre

PATIENT'S DETAILS

Name: NURUL FARHANAH AB RAHIM
Code: 2009011016
Date checked in: 151109
Time checked in: 1430
Attending doctor: NORAINI MD NOR
Status: SUSPICION OF CONTAMINATING THE ZM1234 ZOMBIE-LIKE VIRUS
Action: QUARANTINED UNTIL HOLIDAYS ARE OVER

Tgk inilah hasil bile aku da weng. hahaha